Reyes Vs. Tulo

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So with the All Star Game voting deadline 11 days away, Jose Reyes actually isn't the leading vote getter for shortstop.  Currently he's trailing Troy Tulowitzki, so let's look at the statistics:

This doesn't even consider the stolen bases or defense that Reyes brings to the table.  Skeptics might argue that Tulo's power numbers would supersede what Reyes has done, but Jesus look at Reyes' slugging percentage.  It's higher than Tulo's!  Hell Reyes' batting average is practically the same as Tulo's on base percentage.

Seriously, I find this appalling and ludicrous.  So this got me thinking about other things that have been absolutely ridiculous this year.

1) The Giants complaining that Buster Posey's injury was a dirty play.


If you aren't familiar with the play, Poser broke his leg on this collision:

Posey is out for the year.

So I was talking with my brother, and his take on it was exceptionally astute.



Remember this guy?

More specifically, remember this guy?

Listen, steroids were everywhere in baseball.  I still dread the day that some report breaks out and we all find out that Mike Piazza juiced.  So to only call out the Giants for harboring a steroid user is ridiculous.

But he is (debatably) the home run king, and he overtook a legend to do it.  Everyone in America who cared about baseball had to watch the most awkward celebration that I can possibly think of.  Bud Selig didn't want to be there.  Hank Aaron wasn't there.  Everyone knew it was bullshit, but we all had to carry on this facade that it was irrefutably Bonds' record.

Here's my analogy.  Imagine a crazy mom.  Like Tyson crazy.  Imagine she hires a clown for her kid's birthday party.  Then imagine that just when junior is about to blow out the candles, the mom jumps the clown and rails the shit out of him in front of all the kids.  And I mean starts doing all kinds of crazy stuff to him while all these children watch.  That has to be so ridiculously awkward.  That's what it was like for me to watch Bonds break the record.

So ridiculous rant aside, if you harbored the most notorious cheater in baseball (apologies to the Reds and Pete Rose), you simply forfeit your right to bitch about what everyone has essentially said was a clean play.

2) The fact that John Sterling and Suzyn Waldman are still employed.


It's just ridiculous.  It's RIDICULOUS.  With a lot of these rants I have to sit and think of analogies and jokes to be funny.  All I need to do to prove this point, is ask you to please  click here. Seriously, you need to click here.

It's not even that John Sterling has the cheesiest, most awful home run calls in the history of public radio.  It's that he's BAD AT CALLING THE GAMES.  He confuses base hits with foul balls, confuses home runs with pop outs.  He loses focus, he tells ridiculous stories, he's just bad at calling games.

And Suzyn Waldman, well, she actually does understand baseball.  It's actually ridiculous that Sterling doesn't allow her to call any of the play by play, especially seeing as how much time she spends correcting Sterling's mistakes.  It's just that her voice sounds like Marlee Matlin trying to sing an aria.  And ironically, Waldman is a classically trained opera singer.

No, seriously.

I know it's like thinking that Edward Scissorhands once gave manicures, but it's true.

If you have the time, listen to Jay Mohr talk about those two (and Joe Buck.)  It's hilarious, and it's true.

3) The Marlins hire Jack McKeon

Holy shit when did Omar Minaya become the GM of the Marlins???

Let me put it this way.  A few weeks ago my grandfather passed away in his sleep at the age of 90.  He spent many years as a steamfitter at Clarkson College in New York.  I swear to God the man could figure out any machine or device in front of him.  He built his own house in upstate New York, was in my eyes a master sailor, I mean there was nothing he couldn't work on.

As he got older, I wouldn't necessarily want him to be doing those things anymore, for no other reason other than the man was aging.  It happens.

How the hell is an 80 year old man going to get Hanley Ramirez on track?  How is he going to help a Josh Johnson-less pitching staff?

I don't want Tom Seaver in my starting rotation, I don't want Darryl Strawberry in the outfield, hell it looks like even Pedro Feliciano is done, and it's because of their age!  I understand that managing requires significantly less athleticism, but come ON.  If this turns the Marlins around I will gladly eat my words, but I just do not see how hiring an 80 year old man to come clean up that mess is the right move to make.

Well folks, remember, Vote for Reyes!

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Let's go Mets!