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Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Reasons to be pissed






I don't know about you, but I feel that I've been failed.  Not just by the Mets, but it seems like by everyone around me.

  • Failed by an American Government who has a worse gambling problem than A-Rod.
  • Failed by the PA drivers who don't understand basic concepts of driving, including but sure as shit not limited to:
    • Turn signal use
    • Left lane avoidance
    • Inability to navigate a traffic circle
    • Inability to drive a different speed than the car next to them
    • Inability to not attempt to change lanes while parallel to said cars
  • Failed by the generic idiotic bullshit that we all have to go through on a daily basis.
And it's really uncalled for.  If you look hard enough you can find stories of perseverance, tenacity, and hope.

See this chick?













Her name is Pamela Salant.  She fell 50 feet and survived for three days eating bugs, caterpillars, and drinking creek water.  If I'm late for work without eating breakfast and I drive past a sonic, I want to pull over and risk getting fired to quench my need for greasy goodness.

Or how about this?











Endured a tragic situation that anyone would have accepted him eroding away in a down pour of endless self-pity.  Instead, he turned the word "Believe" into a mantra for all who will listen.  And I, for one, believe that he will walk again.

Or how about this kid working hard and getting to call that Reyes home run the other night?




















This little kid accomplished at age 11 what I have often dreamed of doing.

My point is that life is hard enough.  More often than not we're surrounded by the negative, and the positive moments just seem too few and far between.  

Sports provides us an outlet of escape, an opportunity to get passionate through a platform with a clear winner and loser.  It's something we can vest a legitimate interest in, but at the end of the day doesn't really matter (i.e. think about how you felt the moment you heard Bin Laden was killed in the middle of the Mets/Phils game.)  

It's what makes me come to games early in hopes of getting a ball from batting practice.  It's why I keep a glove and baseball in my car at all times.  It's why my friends and I will play catch around the old Shea Stadium bases, pretending to turn two, throw runners out at second, or work on our "change-ups" and "curve balls".

So as a Mets fan, when I'm looking for something positive to take from my sports escape, the past couple of nights it's left me with one glaring question:

HOW FUCKING HARD IS IT TO THROW THE GODDAMNED BALL TO FIRST BASE?











(fun fact, I felt my entire body tense up as I typed that.)


I mean come on Mets.  I've accepted you aren't going to make the playoffs (almost).  I can deal with the games that you lose when you give me your best (kinda).  But Jesus Christ you're representing the most abused fan base on the planet.  When we aren't dealing with jerkoff Yankee fans it's the dipshit Philly fans who have an unjustified sense of entitlement worse than the Kardashians and Hiltons combined (I say this since baseball has been around since the 19th century and Phillies fans didn't exist until 2007.)

So listen to me very carefully Mets.  You got a night off to clear your collective head, so it's time that you watch this video and then follow my advice.




Sweep the Braves like you'd Sweep the Leg.  Then do the crane into Jason Heyward's face.  They're slumping and it's time to take advantage.  Give us Mets fans something to enjoy this weekend and get us within contention of the wildcard.

Make me proud this weekend boys.  LET'S GO METS!

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